Turning the corner on Fear

There is a lot to say about fear and its affect on me/us. In my experience, fear can grab hold of you and totally distort the view of your life and your future.

Last night I woke up in the middle of the night in one of those cold sweats, where you are bombarded with the thoughts of what could go wrong. In this case from the economic situation we are facing and the panic generated from the lack of understanding and inaction from congress. (there is a much bigger story here too obviously), and the fear being compounded by the media reporting.

I woke up with the absolute realization that the game had changed and I was at risk. This wasn't an abstract concept. It was the recognition that the game had changed and all the rules and assumptions based on those rules were out the window. In the worst case scenario, if the economic system unravels then I and a lot of other people could be cast into a dire survival mode.

I found myself watching these thoughts roll out, creating a vast net like a spider web that ensnares and traps the victim. Thoughts can do that: create whole realities in themselves. And in creating this reality in my mind, I became aware of the way I was shrinking into the corner of my mind becoming smaller and more immobilized with every escalating dire prognosis.

I don't like giving a lot of credence to the fear based thought patterns. Usually, I am able to totally change tracks of thinking and get out of the pit of the negative. This time I couldn't. The force of the collective consensus of the situation had too strong a hold of me. So, I tried something else. This time I followed the path of the worst case scenario to see where it would lead. I'm sure you know that spiral: Loss of income or assets leads to not being able to pay bills, leads to losing my house; which, since I am self employed, results in having no place to work or create.

In the past, when I have been gripped by this fear, the unraveling usually ends up with the end point of becoming a bag lady. I understand this is a universal fear. This time, I got a different perspective. If I lost everything, I could still go to the library and use the computer to write. There was still a way I could have a vehicle to express. That was at the core. If I could do that, then I can keep going. I didn't have to have all that stuff, but I do need a way to continue to express and create. That part of me is the pathway to survival and revival.

I don't know if this makes sense to anyone else, but, following this line of worst case logic got me to a core of something really important to me that I will not lose no matter what the external environment. Creating and expressing are at the core of who I am. If I have a way to continue that, I can take care of myself. Knowing that gave me the sense of calm and reassurance that I will be OK no matter what happens externally. Having that calm, helped me get out of the trap of the fear based thought spiral.

So I wonder what this is for others. What is it that is so essential in you, that you know you will not lose, no matter what the real or imagined worst case scenarios are?
I am totally surprised to find how liberating the discovery of this answer has been for me.
I hope it will be for you too.